


reading lips

by xumyuho



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Confessions, First Kiss, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-30
Updated: 2015-08-30
Packaged: 2018-04-18 04:46:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4692542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xumyuho/pseuds/xumyuho
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>'He knows', is what runs immidiately through Minghao's mind.<br/>'He knows, about it all. And he wants it to stop.'</p><p>Nothing is more scary than that.</p>
            </blockquote>





	reading lips

It’s a cold night when Jun wakes him up from the sofa where he has fallen asleep, shaking him awake and then stepping back. His voice is a mere whisper, which means the other members are probably already asleep.  
  
  
“Let’s go outside.”  
  
  
They go out together pretty often, around the small streets between the buildings and through parks and stairways, sometimes in silence, sometimes while holding a conversation. Sometimes holding hands, sometimes sitting on benches leaning into each other, sometimes walking with a long distance between them. Sometimes throwing insults and kicking cans and thinking thoughts out loud.   
It’s always their time to just say whatever or say nothing at all. And the long looks and content smiles Jun gives him afterwards always make his heart grow twice in size. So Minghao just nods, gets his coat and they walk out of the house in middle of the night.  
  
  
***  
  
  
Tonight they’re not holding hands, nor talking. Lately, that has been just it. Jun has been distant, always apologizing even for the lightest of touches, and stopped teasing him completely. It was weird, but Minghao hadn’t mentioned it, scared that things would change even further.  
  
But there’s no distance tonight, Jun is close enough for Minghao to reach out and touch, within the lines of reassuring closeness that the younger is always yearning for. But he wouldn’t, not now. Junhui is deep in thought, just looking forward and not even glancing at the younger boy. Minghao says nothing, even when he notices the others hands balling into fists on his sides. He just walks behind Junhui, his shaky breaths coming out in visible puffs in the cold air. Like he always does. He doesn’t give into his nerves, just keeps on going.  
  
  
***  
  
  
They stop at the far end of the park, and something knots up in Minghao’s stomach in the way Jun turns around slowly, like he’s preparing for something.  Jun is still not looking at him, and it’s so dark. It scares him that he doesn’t know what kind of a face the other male is making.   
  
_He knows_ , is what runs immidiately through Minghao’s mind.   
_He knows, about it all. And he wants it to stop._  
Nothing is more scary than that.   
  
Minghao opens his mouth to say something, but no voice leaves him. At that, Junhui just suddenly turns to look right at him. It makes his heart just _clench_. There’s some kind of _raw_ emotion there Minghao has never seen before, in the way Jun just _searches_ his face, like he was in the world’s most horrible place right here next to the broken swing-sets and withered flower beds. At this point Minghao has no clue what was going on, but he takes a breath and tries to speak up again.   
  
Junhui doesn’t let him though. He steps in closer. Suddenly his other hand is on Minghao’s wrist, squeezing and pulling him closer, and the other hand is on his hip, keeping him there while his face is leaning in to- _Oh_.  
  
  
And they are kissing.   
  
  
The hand on his wrist lets go and moves up to cup his face instead, while Jun’s soft lips were slowly and gently but _surely_ ruining his life right now and making his butterfly infested stomach sink into the concrete below his feet. After a while Minghao had built up enough courage to move his lips against Jun’s, which resulted in the other males actions to be more forceful, demanding. _Confident_ and just like Minghao had always thought they would be, and more.  
  
After what felt like hours of tentatively making out, Jun leans back and just gives him this look of _utter_ disbelief, like _this_ and Minghao were the answer to everything he had been struggling with lately. Whatever… _this_ was. But Minghao knew that _this_ was all he ever wanted to do on these walks from now on.   
  
The hand on his hip tries to move away. Minghao whines quietly, and takes a step closer, clasps the front of Junhui’s jacket in his fists and closes the distance between their lips again. It was clumsy, incredibly so, and this is Minghao’s first time kissing _anyone ever_ but it doesn’t seem to matter to Jun. He could feel Jun _smiling_ into the kiss, pulling him closer and he was sure that his knees were going to give out any second now. He can feel a hand in his hair, fingernails scraping his scalp gently and fingers lacing themselves in his blonde hair, pulling him in deeper. There’s a trace of something bitter on Jun’s lips, his mouth was warmer and wetter than Minghao had really anticipated. He loses all his senses when he feels Jun’s tongue slip between his lips, and after a while his lungs are _burning_ as he realizes he has stopped breathing for who knows how long now.   
  
They pull away and just stare at each other, faces still only inches apart, panting. Then Jun is smiling that blindingly bright, _idiotic_ smile at him and Minghao really wishes he had the pride and self-respect needed to punch Jun in his stupid face.  
  
  
***   
  
Jun ends up dragging him home by the hand, still smiling all the way back. It’s first time they hold hands in a long while. They haven’t really said a word about any of... _this_ , Minghao just not having the words to do so and Junhui seemingly content with how things were in this silence they shared.   
  
When Jun confidently tells him that he'll be sleeping in the same bed as Minghao, he just moves over and turns around. Junhui gives him another of those smiles that has probably destroyed lives, and Minghao finally gathers himself up mentally and asks him to kiss him again, voice shaky even for a whisper.  
  
Jun looks a bit taken aback by this, but he still nods. Jun’s hand is back in Minghao’s hair again, brushing it back from his face and leans in to capture his lips into another kiss. This time there is no hurry, no demands, no force. It’s slow, but not sloppy. Jun’s tongue slips into his mouth and he lets out a shaky sigh through his nose. Their legs are tangled under the covers, and Jun’s both hands now cradling Minghao’s head.  
They lean their foreheads together after pulling away, breathing in the same air. Minghao is sure his heart is gonna give out sometime soon, so he’d better tell Jun the truth before he goes into cardiac arrest.   
  
“.. Hyung... I- ”   
  
“I know,” comes an answer even before Minghao can finish. Junhui’s looking at him, his thumb circling the younger’s cheek so gently its almost painful.   
And that’s all that really matters for Minghao at this point, so he closes his eyes and keeps listening to Junhui's breathing.  
 **  
**

**Author's Note:**

> the china line first kisses nobody asked for  
> I really need for these boys to be happy, ya feel me??


End file.
